Tuesday, August 31, 2010


I really appreciate all your nice messages. To be honest, I really didn't think anyone would notice if I left. It's true, I'm burned out, but it's not so much that I'm burned out with blogging. I'm just burned out in general. I'm rather depressed just now, to tell the truth. Partly it's because summer is ending, and maybe that change in the season is just having a bad effect on me. It's really been a lovely summer - so warm and pretty, and the garden has done great. Several time this last month, I've found myself consciously thinking, "I'm going to REMEMBER this summer," almost as if I'm afraid that something bad is about to happen, and I'll be happy someday to have these good memories. But I also had another birthday a few weeks ago, and I guess I'm starting to feel old - I'm 51 - and I'm becoming oppressed with fears about what will happen to the kids as Dean and I get older and less able to stand the constant burden of caring for them. People who don't have autistic kids don't realize how overwhilmingly REACTIVE your life is - it's barely possible to originate and carry out any plan, because all our time is taken up with responding to the incessant avalanche of demands. Anything you start is interrupted, usually with the sort of base needs a 2-year old would have: food, toilet, entertainment. Most people deal with a 2-year old for...well, a year or so; we've been dealing with them for over 15, and after a while it wears you down.

I don't usually talk much about the hard part of my life, but when I find myself frequently on the verge of tears, I think maybe I should ask some of you kind people to take the time to say a prayer for me. I don't ask for help much; hardly ever, actually,, but I'm feeling a bit low just now.

It's not that I disliked writing the blog; it's just that I've gotten into a pattern of thinking, "Oh, I really should write about that!... Well, I'm tired, I'll do it later...Drat it, now it's too late..." and I was simultaneously obsessing about my NOT writing, so I was both guilty about not doing it, and guilty about not doing it well.

But I don't want this all to be a downer; I had some pictures in my camera I'd been meaning for a long time to post, but as usual I just didn't have the energy, so here they are:

This was the corn earlier this summer. We had a big storm a few weeks ago, and I think a sort of microburst came through a gap in the trees on the right, and blew over a number of stalks on that side. But most of the corn was really good.

This year I tried something new: two butternut squash plants. I planted them in front of the corn, but they grew and grew, so finally I had to resort to winding the plants through the rows of corn. In so doing, I unwittingly adopted one of the practices of the early native Indians; they used to grow squash in the space between the corn rows. So far I see 6 squashes on the vines; they keep producing flowers, but I don't think any more will develop - I doubt they'd have time to mature in the time left before the weather turns cold.

Here are our tomatoes, with a tall beanpole at the back - I built it myself, out of bamboo sticks and a weird tough vine that grows over the trees behind our fence. It's like a grapevine, and it's always straggling over onto our side of the fence. This was the first time I ever thought of a use for it - it's rather tough and woody, but has quite attractive curly tendrils that help the beans grab on.

A VERY attractive dragonfly I found sitting on the netting covering the blueberries one morning. The picture doesn't do him justice; he was a very brilliant green velvet.

We've had other garden visitors this summer; I saw a small rabbit one morning, but they've pretty much left our garden alone this year. A few days ago there was a story in the paper about how Monarch Butterflies are no longer around in Ottawa, because so much of our wilderness area has been cut down, taking with it the plants they like best. One of those plants is Joe Pye Weed, which I've grown for years. Lo and behold, two days later, I saw Monarch Butterflies feeding on them, and they stayed around for several days; I saw one or two yesterday, as a matter of fact, but for a couple of days, they were having a regular party.

At one point, about 6 were out there, and when Dean and Emma and I went out to look at them, they left the Joe Pye Weed and began fluttering around over US! I said I thought they were actually trying to drive us away from their food supply! Just try to imagine half a dozen butterflies trying to look menacing! We also had a garter snake this summer, but he was so sneaky I was never ready with a camera to take a picture of him.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Time to say goodbye

I think I'm going to wind down this blog. The stupidity of the religious Left has stopped being funny to me, and I find that commenting on their continuing decomposition just isn't worth the energy genuine indignation would require. Politics is also going from bad to worse, what with the Ground Zero Abomination Mosque Roach House project failing to produce the correct response: pistol duels. I'm starting to feel like M. Scott Peck dealing with one of his evil-infected patients: that the sickness of so many parts of the world today is so great that it will overwhelm me if I don't get away from it. I'm going to go on reading Chesterton, translating obscure French films, and working in the garden when I'm not looking after my family. There will always be Chris Johnson's place to go for humorous commentary, and the Belmont Club for gloomy forbodings. If something really important happens, I might make the occasional post, but I think this blog has served its purpose. Thanks for all the nice people who've commented here and thought my writing worth reading.

Monday, August 02, 2010

Geico commercial

I haven't enjoyed a commercial this much since the "Canadian police chase" from a few years ago.

Makes me laugh every time. "He's thinking! He's thinking! Oh, the tension!"