Friday, July 14, 2006

Ruddy clematis

That clematis at the back - as usual, the MOMENT I touched it, a foot of it died! I'm the Typhoid Mary of the clematis world, I tell you, the woman with the Touch Of Death.

The one at the front had its 4 little flowers, from the buds that it came with, but since then, nothing. A little piece of that one died, too. You know, I just don't "get" clematis; I don't understand why they do what they do. This happened with the first one, too. They seem to grow nicely, you get these exciting-looking buds and you think that this is just the beginning of horticultural bliss. Then the flower opens...and the whole plant stops dead in its tracks. Not only does it not produce any more flowers, it won't produce one single additional LEAF. It seems frozen with shock at what it's just done - like an old lady who unexpectedly farts and then is covered with embarrassment and confusion. I'll leave the two I have, but they're on their own now - I've got no time for recalcitrant climbers who aren't even grateful for the nice compost I lavished on them.

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